I Thought I Was an Atheist
Yearsss before I got sucked into the world of spirituality, intuition, and soul searching, I thought I was an atheist. Well, until I realized there was a difference between an atheist (one who doesn’t believe in God or gods) and a theist (one who does). I was definitely more of a theist, I was just kind of allergic to organized religion.
Both of my parents had grown up Catholic, and my dad in particular did not revel in that experience. Starting at a young age, Catholicism had a negative connotation for me, and since it was the only religion or source of spirituality I was exposed to, I thought it was all that existed.
I remember trying to read the Bible as a young child and finding it frightening. I also remember numerous times when my siblings and I would be “bad,” and my dad would threaten to send us to Sunday School.
Still, I knew, even as a child, that I believed in something, I just didn’t know what. I discovered that much later, into my twenties, when I reconnected with a former coworker. It was a total act of divine intervention that I felt so called to reach out to this woman, who had been no more than a casual work acquaintance.
We were both going through a rough time and quickly found solace in our new friendship. As a way to pass the time, we started to pull oracle cards for guidance and healing, which soon turned into “meditating,” which we would later learn was actually us channeling and giving each other psychic readings. (My friend is a legit psychic medium whose readings and accuracy still blow my mind to this day.)
The rest, as they say, is history 😉 Long gone are my “atheist” days. Now I geek out over anything spiritual and am a total nerd when it comes to learning about others’ beliefs, religions, and practices.
I believe in source or a higher power. I believe that we are infinite souls who reincarnate into new lives over and over again, and in between those lifetimes, we hang back on the “other side,” or soul realm, to learn, guide, and evolve. It’s funny, I’ve had these kind of beliefs for a looong time, and last year I read Journey of Souls by Michael Newton for the first time, and was blown away by how a complete stranger wrote so detailed an account of my own beliefs.
I think, at the end of the day, we all want to believe in something else, something bigger, and know that there is something out there that is watching over us and guiding us along the path of life. And what that looks like and feels like for each person is different, and that’s okay. It’s pretty beautiful actually.